[ some hours after the trial, zelkov's head is still swimming. so much happened and there were so many strong feelings... from himself as well, even if he rarely let it show. and while he's concerned about how a number of people are doing now, he's not sure if it's really his business to be checking up on most of them.
eventually, he wanders over to the book cafe for a fresh cup of tea and some reading to try to focus on... and there's a bit of a sense of relief upon seeing xiao there, giving him a perfect chance to follow up with him on what happened, so long as he feels like discussing it. ]
[ Xiao's giving himself some breathing room in the book cafe. There are people he needs to check up on, namely his cabana mates, but there are others out there he's concerned about. Zelkov isn't one of the first that crosses his mind, but given that they seem to be in agreement over so many things thus far, his company is not unwanted. He'd planned on resting, but some camaraderie after everything could be nice.
Xiao looks at him with tired eyes. ]
As well as one can be, given everything.
[ He's slouching a bit. It's been a long day so far. ]
I...wasn't present for a good portion of it, but I can only assume you were, so I'll ask the you the same thing.
[ And he's seen a lot of things in his very long lifespan. That was...a lot. At Zelkov's offer, though, he'll nod and release a breath he didn't know he was holding. ]
And yes, that will be fine. The flavor does not matter.
[ going over to the counter and filling a mug with hot water... ]
...In my own world, I have rarely felt the need to hesitate in the face of a clear threat. But with the extent of Lobelia's power unknown, and knowing what implicit threats he has made before... I feared that to launch any attack on him might be inviting the destruction of the group at large. And once the two of you were trapped in his card, it was unclear whether you would be able to be brought back to us without his power.
[ he sighs, and takes out a bag of green tea to steep. ]
It was a more helpless feeling than I am accustomed to. Though I acted in accordance with reason, my lack of action still feels somewhat shameful.
[ He follows Zelkov to the counter and takes a seat there. Zelkov's right about a lot of things. Lobelia's power was not one to be taken lightly, and the extent of his abilities was, in the end, quite terrifying. Would any of them have been able to stop him, if he tried to destroy everyone in his path? They're lucky that Lobelia embraced everything that came his way, including his own death(s).
Feeling ashamed, though, is something Xiao understands, but he will not blame Zelkov for it. Anyone who felt that way will not face Xiao's judgment or ire. ]
The feeling of helplessness is one of the most crushing emotions I have experienced – but you are not to blame, nor can I condemn you for your thoughts. Deciding to think things through and assess the situation is not a lack of action. It was rational. It was for the best.
Still, I understand the sentiment. I wish that there was more I could have done, myself.
Your willingness to follow Haruka into that card without a second thought was admirable, in my view. I imagine he would have been quite vulnerable without someone to protect him.
[ Beel and Haruka had been at the forefront of his mind, but Zelkov is right. ]
It may take a while for people to move forward from it, and I can hardly blame them. He caused more than enough destruction for a lifetime, though I'm certain that's what he wanted, in the end. [ ... ] Even so, it's imperative that we try to stay as united as we can.
[ as frustrating as it's been for him to watch people willingly put themselves in that storm's path, he'll do his best not to hold it against any of them. ]
Perhaps everyone will at least be able to move forward with him no longer here as an active influence.
[ another moment, then he sets the mug of tea down in front of xiao. ]
Green tea with mint. I hope you will find it soothing.
[ He puts his hands around the mug, letting the warmth sink in as he takes a sip. He's had a combination like this before. It's quite good.
He gives Zelkov an approving nod. ]
Thank you. It tastes fine.
[ And before he forgets- ]
I tried the recipe that you taught me, after last week's trial. I gave them to the others in the Dodo Cabana. ... I believe it went over well.
[ He worked with what he had after Beel tore up the kitchen, and it probably wasn't nearly as good as how Zelkov makes them, but they were eaten and appreciated nevertheless. Xiao tried! ]
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week 3, post-trial
eventually, he wanders over to the book cafe for a fresh cup of tea and some reading to try to focus on... and there's a bit of a sense of relief upon seeing xiao there, giving him a perfect chance to follow up with him on what happened, so long as he feels like discussing it. ]
How are you faring after the day's events?
no subject
Xiao looks at him with tired eyes. ]
As well as one can be, given everything.
[ He's slouching a bit. It's been a long day so far. ]
I...wasn't present for a good portion of it, but I can only assume you were, so I'll ask the you the same thing.
no subject
[ at least relatively speaking.
with a gesture toward the little cafe area— ]
Can I offer you some tea? I always find it helpful for unwinding after a stressful day.
no subject
[ And he's seen a lot of things in his very long lifespan. That was...a lot. At Zelkov's offer, though, he'll nod and release a breath he didn't know he was holding. ]
And yes, that will be fine. The flavor does not matter.
no subject
[ going over to the counter and filling a mug with hot water... ]
...In my own world, I have rarely felt the need to hesitate in the face of a clear threat. But with the extent of Lobelia's power unknown, and knowing what implicit threats he has made before... I feared that to launch any attack on him might be inviting the destruction of the group at large. And once the two of you were trapped in his card, it was unclear whether you would be able to be brought back to us without his power.
[ he sighs, and takes out a bag of green tea to steep. ]
It was a more helpless feeling than I am accustomed to. Though I acted in accordance with reason, my lack of action still feels somewhat shameful.
no subject
Feeling ashamed, though, is something Xiao understands, but he will not blame Zelkov for it. Anyone who felt that way will not face Xiao's judgment or ire. ]
The feeling of helplessness is one of the most crushing emotions I have experienced – but you are not to blame, nor can I condemn you for your thoughts. Deciding to think things through and assess the situation is not a lack of action. It was rational. It was for the best.
Still, I understand the sentiment. I wish that there was more I could have done, myself.
no subject
Your willingness to follow Haruka into that card without a second thought was admirable, in my view. I imagine he would have been quite vulnerable without someone to protect him.
no subject
[ He looks down at his hands, which are placed on the tabletop. ]
Like you, however, I wish there was more I could have done to stop Lobelia. He did a toll on Haruka and Beelzebub. It was difficult to watch.
no subject
[ he adds a bit of fresh mint to the tea. ]
He was truly a destructive entity in more ways than one.
no subject
[ Beel and Haruka had been at the forefront of his mind, but Zelkov is right. ]
It may take a while for people to move forward from it, and I can hardly blame them. He caused more than enough destruction for a lifetime, though I'm certain that's what he wanted, in the end. [ ... ] Even so, it's imperative that we try to stay as united as we can.
no subject
[ as frustrating as it's been for him to watch people willingly put themselves in that storm's path, he'll do his best not to hold it against any of them. ]
Perhaps everyone will at least be able to move forward with him no longer here as an active influence.
[ another moment, then he sets the mug of tea down in front of xiao. ]
Green tea with mint. I hope you will find it soothing.
no subject
He gives Zelkov an approving nod. ]
Thank you. It tastes fine.
[ And before he forgets- ]
I tried the recipe that you taught me, after last week's trial. I gave them to the others in the Dodo Cabana. ... I believe it went over well.
[ He worked with what he had after Beel tore up the kitchen, and it probably wasn't nearly as good as how Zelkov makes them, but they were eaten and appreciated nevertheless. Xiao tried! ]